In Master Giacon's realm of sex toys and whips: “I got into BDSM thanks to a Boldi and De Sica film. Feelings? During sessions I happen to feel them but I can't communicate them”
What does it mean to be a Master? What are the dynamics that are established between the dominator and his slave? Why is it still a source of shame in Italy to admit to having BDSM fantasies? FQMagazine met Master Giacon, who has made this passion his job: “My mission is to make people feel good and free”.”
Christian Grey really exists. It is called Alessandro Giacon, He is 34 years old and lives about 30 kilometres north of Bologna. Master Giacon, as he is known on social media, opened at FQMagazine the doors of his home, a frescoed 19th-century villa that served as Nazi headquarters during the Second World War. Everything within those four walls speaks of the passion of this young Paduan, now adopted Emilian, for the BDSM world. Starting with the cage at the entrance, which is actually a cage that pays no homage to the Shakira from the “She Wolf” video”, as the writer thought. In the room there are poles to attach ropes to and even a second, smaller cage right under the bed. The highlight, however, is at the end of the house, on the left.
The scene is roughly that of the film “Fifty Shades of Grey”“Come, I want to show you my playroom,” Alexander tells me, asking Alexa to turn on the lights. The view opens up on an environment into which I enter without the air of a fake God-fearing woman offended in her modesty that Anastasia Steele, the protagonist of the aforementioned film, had. On the contrary, not being very well educated on the subject, I ask with a certain curiosity about the tools that furnish the place: there are, among other things, the pillory, the St. Andrew's Cross, the fucking machine, a wardrobe full of fetish outfits and, above all, drawers full of sex toys and dildos of all sizes. Not to put too fine a point on it, but the contents of that room are worth a fortune.
How many years have you been a master by profession and how did this passion come about?
I started 6-7 years ago, while the first approach was at the age of 10 with a Boldi and De Sica film. In one scene there is a countess who ties Boldi to a chair, whips him and plays with him in various ways. Many people laughed, I saw it in sexual terms and wanted to know more. I started watching the first videos, both porn and otherwise, and reading forums. However, I lacked the practical part, until I came to have my first contact with the culture BDSM in the context of the Decadence evening in Bologna.
Has this part of you never destabilised you?
No, for me it is such a natural and normal thing that I never thought it was wrong, also thanks to my parents who always wanted to see me happy no matter who I was. When I saw that this side brought me a happiness that other things didn't give me, I threw myself into it.
The moment when you realised you wanted to drop everything to do a master's degree?
To think that for 40 years I would have to work 8-10 hours a day caused me anxiety and discomfort. At the age of 27 I said no more. Although the family business gave me security and a fixed salary I decided that I would rather end up under a bridge, but free and happy not to have a life programmed to do the same things.
When someone proposes to be your slave, on what basis do you decide to accept the application?
By now I have a sensitivity that allows me to understand him from the way he writes. I have studied a lot of psychology, even a bit of NLP (neuro-linguistic programming, Editor's note:) and I sense whether a person might be suitable for what I offer or not. I have no difficulty in choosing, also because having a high price compared to the average allows for a good skimming.
What makes these people want to venture into such territories?
They come to me because they understand that I don't stop at pleasure in its most superficial form, but I try to go deep down at a psychological level and into their souls. A session done in a detached manner does not amuse me. I give it my all, it is as if at that moment I am with the person I like most in the world, and I am, because I am giving and receiving something at the same time.
Why is confessing to having certain fantasies, either as a master or as a slave, a source of shame in Italy?
Because we give too much weight to the judgement of others, and this is the best way to ruin our lives. To avoid being misjudged we try to hide, but hiding from others also means hiding from ourselves. Then there are the Church and other socio-cultural factors that contribute to a block on these topics.
Outside Italy is it different?
A lot. There are still sexual taboos, but people feel less judged and are therefore able to be more free.
Have you ever felt a deeper connection with any slave?
There is always more underneath in my opinion. What I try to do is to transmit love. It is a concept of universal love that is difficult to achieve, to experience and also to explain, but it belongs to me very much. I behave towards people as if they were my boyfriend or girlfriend.
How can you feel this love for anyone?
The basic concept is that we are all part of the same thing. If I love myself I also love you, and vice versa. This leads to a different state of awareness, you realise that things in the world happen for a reason, you start to have faith in God...
Do you prefer fights to be one-shot or do you see your slaves again?
There are people with whom I have had emotional relationships for years and others whom I see only once, maybe they give me very strong emotions and then I can no longer see them for various reasons.
One hears from time to time about erotic games gone wrong, have you ever been afraid to do any practice?
Only in a few situations, because I do everything with knowledge. When you do something knowing the risks and creating the situation that limits them as much as possible, you don't feel the fear.
Among the services you offer is that of a fake boyfriend.
The important thing is that the person in question does not want to be told: ‘You are the most beautiful in the world’. As long as it's within a role-playing game it's fine, the moment I'm asked to make fun of someone then I find it difficult.
How much do you work per week?
There is no rule, there are weeks when I work 4-5 days and other periods when I don't work for 3 weeks. I manage myself according to what I want to do and personal commitments.
So it is a very profitable business.
Yes absolutely, although with Covid the work has decreased. Considering that I also have a non-European clientele, very few travelled during the pandemic. Now business has picked up well, but not yet like before.
What are the first whims you have taken away with what you have earned?
Replenishing my collection of sex toys and fetish clothes, so I actually reinvested in my business.
Is there a risk of becoming trapped in character? Do Alessandro and Master Giacon ever come into conflict with each other?
If Alexander and the Master existed, I would say yes. There is a phrase I like very much that says: “Every person has a public life, a private life and a secret life”. I merged these three lives and made one, because I have no secrets, the things I do are in plain sight everywhere, so I have no such conflict.
After experiencing everything, how do you find new stimuli to keep going and not get bored?
People have nuances you cannot even imagine, each one is unique. Even the same practice but with different individuals completely changes emotions, feelings, timing and rhythms.
Is there room for feelings in your life?
Absolutely, yes, in fact I often have very strong feelings for people I have just met and I find it difficult because I cannot communicate them: it might annoy them and lead to detachment.
Do you have a plan B for when you can no longer practise this profession?
I will always be able to do it because compared to classic escorting my work is also based on experience, not only on physical appearance, which is still important. But I am also pursuing many other paths that relate to my passion and my mission in the world, which is to create ways to communicate what I feel, and to make people feel good and free. Starting with teaching what I do: there is a lack of culture and terminology for these topics. Already the words sadism and masochism are wrong. The sadist takes pleasure in the suffering of others, I do not. I only feel it at the moment when that person has a pleasure in returning because they want what I am doing.
Let's wait for your school then...
(Laughs, Editor's note:) We are working for you. Do you know when I realised what I wanted to do with my life? During a session a man shared his experience with me. He always knew he was homosexual but in order not to disappoint the expectations of others he took the more classical route, so he got married and had children, but this created a very strong inner sadness for him. When his father died in his arms, the first thing he thought was: ‘Luckily he didn't find out I was gay’. This shows how strong sexual taboo and the importance one gives to the judgement of others. There I realised that maybe I could do and change something. I may never succeed, but trying is not wrong.